Lets talk about it. Penis, Dick, Cock, Pene, Bicho, Pinga. Let's be realistic we never hear about a person saying they want a guy with a small or average size penis . Even if the guy has everything going for him, if he can't seem to please his partner with what God gave him, that may be the deal breaker. Ok we already established that, Many of us insist that we are not "hoes" for wanting a man with a sizeable gift but we just "know what we want". Fine.
Lets talk about the guy that wants to be seen for more than for whats in between his legs because guess what, they are out there, and they want love and appreciation for their mind, their spirit and their ability to be a good man to you in your relationship, not just an occasional jumpoff, one night stand or cut buddy. For some people size matters but last night I met someone who was looking for someone who can get pass that. For him personality matters, intelligence matters, connection matters.
I had seen him in his underwear for the first time since knowing him and my eyes pierced up and down his body. He had been working out way more than previously thought and his body was coming together very well. The record scratching moment was when I got his crotch area and realized while he wasn't hard he was extremely well endowed penis, balls the whole works. We weren't going to do anything but I was awfully curious as to what the hell was going on between his legs.
Being the sexually liberated person I am, I made a passing a comment of course about his workout effort but also about him being well endowed. While I expected this be a compliment, this brought out a slight insecurity about it. To be a black man and hung like, one would think it would be considered more than a blessing. For him it has become an absolutely curse. He's a college graduate, lives in a decent neighbourhood, owns his car,smart, young, talented, handsome, works out and has an aspiring career in broadcasting and yet he is looked as a penis with legs. It's very similar to how most men look at women as a face, tits and legs or a face, booty and legs and every thing else seems to come as a secondary priority.
When working out, people often gather around him while he working out just to see his ding a ling flop around in his track pants or even in the early morning when he goes jogging, it's as if his neighbours stalks him with their eyes and while again for some people this may be a huge ego booster for him it's awkward and downright annoying. Try being flagged by lifeguards and beach patrol for "indecent exposure", or better yet accussed of shoplifting because of the inappropriate bulge in his slacks or jeans. Meanwhile this constant harrassment is all a ploy by many to get him "prove" to them that whats in his slacks is the real deal. After speaking to him, I realized that not only is it harrassment, not only is it a nuisance but isn't this illegal? Would you ask a woman to unbutton her blouse to prove that she isn't "hiding merchandise" in her tits? Meeting guys albeit in the club or online is a big enough problem as it is but you know how the tacky size queens are a bit overjoyed when they see a handsome man, a car, nice body, dressed well and a bulge that won't quit. The conversation quickly goes from "so what do you do for a living" to "damn I wanna ride your dick".
I quickly took back my compliment because I wanted to make sure that he knew that I saw him as more than just meat between his legs. He also made me realize it is about how you approach a person that determines the outcome. I know for me, it reinforces my rule that I set back in 2008, that I would keep compliments about someones body to myself! There's something way more genuine about the interaction then hearing or saying "you're so sexy", "damn your body is nice", "you got a fat ass", etc etc etc.
According to him, he didn't take any offense however had it been someone else...then you know it'd be alot different. Luckily, we're just friends
I wrote this because I wanted to bring attention to a subject that is talked about but not looked at from another point of View.
Thoughts?
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Let me take a long, hard, deep breath. The truth is people will always like a bigger package. I think as a people we have overrated sex too much and have become so obsessed with everything bigger/larger and creating damage. The influence from the porn industry etc and the emphasis on being pounded hard and long makes it worse.
ReplyDeleteI would say, thank God for what you have and wish you were not blessed with 1 inches.
You can't have your cake and eat it. You know how many people would die for one of what you have.
It is not that you are known for it but people like what you have. It is like a big breast girl complaining her boobs are big and why men look at them more than her. People will always love breasts and will fantasize about them - just like dicks/cocks/penis.
I would want mine so long - I want it running down my legs lol kidding
Love what you have and pray you can use it.
I agree...love what you have and learn how to use it
ReplyDeleteSize Matters: The Problematic Penis Insecurities
ReplyDeletePeople will always link basic attraction to sexual arousal. And unfortunately, size is a “big” issue within different communities universally because penis is, consciously or unconsciously, one of the most important things in the whole world. We have to realize that things run just deeper than the size; let’s examine the stereotypes and stigmas that surround size expectations amongst Black and Latino men alike. Penis size obsession is far more common among men than we think. We feel that if we do not live up to the hype of what’s being anticipated, egos can be left shattered, because psychologically, the penis represents manhood which equals dominancy. This can led to a ride on a emotional, mental and physical rollercoaster, promising to damage a relationship altogether. Millions of women surveyed results have been concluded stating that in regards to size, it is relatively unimportant. But with outside sexual influences within the media and sources of entertainment (the talk shows on sexual stimulation to the music that we listen to that brags about sex and size *coughs*àTrey Songz: “you know I live a magnum lifestyle.”), the topic seems impractical from escaping. Worrying about your penis size or lamenting your lack of it won’t do much good in the long run, if anything, it will just hurt you. Being self-conscious will definitely affect your confidence level and prevent you from having any sexual encounter. I bet that size doesn’t matter when you’re pissy drunk on your knees spit polishing his tool. Moral of the story is, it’s all about inner confidence. And if that’s a problem, there are alternatives to improving your sex life. Just google ‘em!
interesting and true for the most part... There are a lot of decent men out there that want to be judged for more than a big dick, pretty face and fat ass, but its unfortunate that the minor is overshadowed by the majority... The only way to combat that issue is one opinion or conversation at a time...
ReplyDeletei had never actually thought about it from the well-endowed's perspective!!! O_O
ReplyDeleteThe last dude I dated was exactly the opposite. He was well endowed and never wanted to let me forget it. That was all he talked about.
ReplyDeleteI took him to a get together with some of my crew and this fool got drunk and started telling everyone how big his dick was. I forgave him for that, but his focus on his dick is what ended our situation.
He was so used to people worshiping him because of that, that when I didn't he didn't know how to react. I never looked at him as just a dick. I genuinely liked him for him. But after 6 months of hearing how big his dick was, I couldn't take it anymore and I was out.